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Out of the three choices, candy is the most appropriate unless she is a member of Weight Watchers. Make sure she is a connoisseur of wine if you choose to take a nice brand of wine. If it is a dinner party, explain that it does not have to be used that evening (this is because the wines have already been chosen.) As for flowers, it would be a wonderful gesture to send flowers only if the party is in your honor. Have them delivered a day ahead of time. The reason I say this is because when you take a bouquet of flowers to a party, the hostess does not have time to find a vase, trim the stems and arrange a bouquet. For the determined romantic, yes a lovely bouquet would be most appropriate for an intimate party. The most appropriate gift to take to the hostess is a simple ABC formula: A: is for attendance from a prompt RSVP (the commitment to attend.) B: is for behavior to have your character shine through with impeccable manners. C: is a card to send after the party expressing your thanks (guys, that goes for you as well!)

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Nonnie Cameron Owens retired in 1996 from a 32-year career in the airline industry. Among her other careers, she served 12 years as a fraternity housemother at SMU in Dallas and Purdue University in West Lafayette, 7 years as a columnist for the Journal and Courier in Lafayette, Indiana, and 7 years as a college speaker for CAMPUSPEAK, Inc in Denver.

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