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Anytime anyone takes courage for self improvement, a compliment is appreciated. Simply saying, “You look nice” or, “I like your hair” shows compassion, whereas yelling across a restaurant, “So when did you get the rug?” is in poor taste, reflecting your character. If the level of friendship is extremely strong, goofy comments in a private Bubba-type conversation would be interpreted differently. If men want to talk about their hair, they will talk about it. Otherwise, it’s the end of the subject, so don’t push it. People have to remember that personal choices have personal reasons. Cosmetic surgery, hair transplants, and marriage counseling are not signs of insecurity; they are choices. A good friend is supportive and understanding.

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Nonnie Cameron Owens retired in 1996 from a 32-year career in the airline industry. Among her other careers, she served 12 years as a fraternity housemother at SMU in Dallas and Purdue University in West Lafayette, 7 years as a columnist for the Journal and Courier in Lafayette, Indiana, and 7 years as a college speaker for CAMPUSPEAK, Inc in Denver.

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The Power of Civility

Top experts reveal the secrets of social capital

 
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