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If you are eating in Italy, the napkin never leaves the table. It is used for “blotting” your mouth as you eat. In America, if you leave the table temporarily you place the napkin on your chair or on the arm of the chair. At the end of the meal as you leave the table, the napkin is placed adjacent to the place setting. If the plate has been cleared, you may leave it in the “well” of the place setting (the space where the dinner plate is placed). Yes I am aware that Peggy Post, great-granddaughter-in-law of Emily Post, recently had an article where it was advised that diners put the napkin on the table [and not on the chair] because it may be soiled. Not to discount these highly reputable/reliable women, but there is no room on the table for a used napkin (exception: restaurant protocol may have the server refold the napkin and place it adjacent to the place setting.) If you have a soiled napkin, discreetly request a new napkin. Basic formula: napkin on chair during the meal. On the table at the end of the meal. NEVER over the plate unless it is on a room service tray left outside your hotel room after you have called for a pick up.

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  1. June 16, 2010 at 8:38 pm

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Nonnie Cameron Owens retired in 1996 from a 32-year career in the airline industry. Among her other careers, she served 12 years as a fraternity housemother at SMU in Dallas and Purdue University in West Lafayette, 7 years as a columnist for the Journal and Courier in Lafayette, Indiana, and 7 years as a college speaker for CAMPUSPEAK, Inc in Denver. She now speaks for Coleman Productions.

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